Jeremy Stewart: Welfare Suite
WELFARE SUITE
I. an an afterschool special
“olly olly oxen free,”
I circled the snowy perimeter
bushy play zone edges I hid for fear
of finding out
she let the kids beat on each other
her youngest son was also a psychopath
windmilled his skinny arms
and children cowered under his temper but
I wasn’t tagged and
by the time I reached the tree
of prisoners, I was the only
one still playing
day don’t care!
“as long as nobody cries”
the twins had the same teen moustache
pretenders to a band, but Negative Aggression
too stupid a name
for a real band and a smiling kid
always got more Nintendo time than
me because why? because why?
hijinks in the tree fort with
permanent lifetime repercussions
yes I always did have psoriasis
I didn’t invent it for fuck’s sake
her daycare so clean I was
tempted to shit on that white lino
boys played fist hockey while I
was told my dungeons and dragons were Satanic
the day Mom appeared at the door with a bad haircut
because why? did that happen
other places I wasn’t welcome
(except on account of a subsidy
I said I knew how to spell “stupid”
“do you now” as she inserted an ice cube into my
milk thermos “I don’t want an ice cube, it tastes funny”
“no it doesn’t” under cartoon interrogation lights I might
admit to stomping on that kid’s head but
it was witnessed by everyone so
it won’t come to that
or a concrete tube and bush of aphids
which she said would crawl in my ears
and live in my insides forever
if I went too close to that bush
or walked to school in a pool
of that kid’s orange hamburger barf
on the table forever
forced to sing chin chopper chin chopper
for fucking ever and nap time
on pee-smell foam with no pillow
forever and the old folks’ home, wow
bring joy to strange faces
scuffed my heels on concrete shit
and orange pine needles
failed to picture my own face
amongst the gappy smiles
but easy enough to imagine
to be erased and pictured
on my own
milk carton
or climbing leaping! out of the bush into daylight alone
missing child who starts off
and keeps running flying
forever
II. welfare poem
hi welfare baby we’re
on welfare mommy
we’re high on welfare money and welfare
brother big kid sister pants
Lisa Bart welfare soft drink
family services syrup welfare ID
soft drink LSD warfare
it’s Wednesday
eat big buckets of partially-exposed Kentucky welfare
I’ve been trying to try out
extra large size welfare
one-size-fits extra welfare with a hole in the crotch
look at me
look at me
I stole some shit
welfare death fart cloud
because your whole welfare family is on welfare
III. for Tigger and Gina
reel in the fumes
of the Zellers shoe department
brand name experience
in waves
I wanted to possess an unmistakable
collect things but later
thrown in black green bags
feel momentum of your work’s lift-off
chew eraser
the weight is paralyzed
our cat-killer neighbour
obscure cat-killing
got no no nothing
to uninhabit
(boo hoo
boo hoo hoo
water weeds in ditches
we wanted Umbro shorts
we got Mitre shorts
we got spandex shorts
single pubescent self-stabbing motion
but they weren’t shiny enough
oblique river beds to nap
kidnap and catnap
broken ballcap
playground lost item
reporting people
swimming in ditches
strangling form
watch all the fluids drain
pet a dead kitty, no no no no
but are you really sure it’s dead
library magazines in the rain
puddle on bedroom floor
seep sop soak
creep crop croak
Seer’s catalogue binding glue
huff a lung sniff
moldy rotten and stashed
where nobody would need to look
we wanted all our favourite tapes, but at the right tension
within tolerances and biases of tape
screwed around a yellow pencil
hushing wow and flutter
mumbles to bruises
failure to return
I’m sorry but I don’t understand
_____
Jeremy Stewart is the winner of the 2014 Robert Kroetsch Award for Innovative Poetry for Hidden City (Snare Books/Invisible Publishing). Stewart is also the author of (flood basement (Caitlin Press 2009). His work has appeared in Geist, Open Letter, and filling Station. Stewart is the General Manager of the Prince George Symphony Orchestra.
Northern BC folio curated by Gillian Wigmore.