BEAUTY: A HOW-TO GUIDE ON HOW TO WORK WITH CLICHÉS A butterfly puzzle of sorts mailed to modern artists   Inside: (no explicit instructions, you are an artist—figure it out).…

CLOSING TIME AT IKEA   We lumbered and dragged, all last January, through chipper rooms, our exhaustion staining crisp white chic. Mecca for preggos, all of us laden, trailing behind…

MARRIAGE MID-WINTER Snow is like a handwritten note — Jim Johnstone   snow falls like an irrelevant argument backed by a fact called wind impossible to stand on the balcony…

FUNERAL TAPE   I think about Abe as I prepare for winter He didn’t focus on the other side of us It may be dark but I want to speak…

GONE FOR LUNCH   Weight-watchered, diet-centred, I’m zoned-out and fried on ephedrine. I’m exiting the thin cult, firing my personal trainer, throwing out the powders and pills. So long to…

CLASSICAL CONDITIONING   On his deathbed Pavlov had a student sit beside him to record the circumstances of his dying. This required a lot of patience, similar to pressing buzzers,…

CATCH AND RELEASE   When they finished putting the water pipeline in, they left the spool behind. It was late summer when I found it in the woods, Kodiak-fat, packed…

THE HOME FOR WAYWARD SPINSTERS   The Home for Wayward Spinsters has large windows overlooking the street. The spinsters like natural light, and they don’t worry about attackers after the…

HAIRSHIRT   In mid-winter, the Conservatory is a space whose damp green, whose broken sunlight could be rented by the hour. People enter in parkas, sigh, then impatiently strip off…

REFLECTIONS ON LITTLE [BULLHEAD]   ‘dublin dan’ was a fine, fine man— & i wonder how much he would pay me for a photo of my cock? i found dan’s…

MOURNING   song bird singed     ROUGH SEXUAL EXPERIENCE!   Says he car gone. Says he used to be one second ago. Can you believe this is an outrage…

IN THE KITCHEN I keep my grocery lists and advice in the same drawer. I was out of sorts looking for keep your chin up in the bakery. Perhaps sourdough?…